Do you struggle with negative or bad thoughts? Do you think badly about yourself? Judge others? Have you ever thought about the origin of these thoughts? I know I used to have terrifying thoughts that would make me anxious and throw me off balance a lot. Unfortunately I know that I am not the only one and I know that many people struggle with "bad" thoughts. So, what's a girl to do?
After analyzing my own self for a few years and doing a lot of soul-searching, I finally found the answer that helped me and I hope will help you. And guess what? I can explain it in shopping terms!
Imagine this... You go to Nordstrom and you find yourself in the middle of shoes, skirts, dresses, tops and pants galore. You find the items that you like and go to try them on. Additionally a sales associate may also bring some extra pieces that she selected for you. After you are finished trying on all of the clothes, you select the ones that you want and leave the store. Later on, you wear your new outfits, check for any damage and make sure they fit as well as you remember. If not, you return them to the store. Pretty basis stuff.
But what about our thoughts? We got them from somewhere. We weren't born with them, that's for sure. Every baby that is born is pure and joyful. Babies don't judge who looks the skinniest in a diaper and who has a designer stroller. So, bad thoughts and judgments had to have come from an outside source such as media, family members, school, classmates, co-workers, etc.
Somewhere along your life you observed someone else saying something or doing something and you picked up that thought. Just like in the store, you put it in your shopping bag, took it home, put it on and kept wearing it. Most of us did it at one time or the other. But unlike shopping, if a thought made us feel bad and didn't fit our personalities, we still kept on "wearing" it.
For example, I used to always feel bad about being late for dinners, gatherings, etc and I always wanted to arrive earlier. This thought made me feel bad every time I thought I was running late and made me anxious. I drove my friends and family crazy watching the clock! After looking back at the origin of the thought (store I got it from), I realized that it was my grandmother who said that it is rude for people to be late and I should always be on time. Even though that thought didn't fit my personality, I took it anyway and started "wearing" it. After realizing that this thought has given me more stress than peace, I decided that it was time to throw out that thought, just as I would throw out a dress that wasn't fitting me.
If there are any thoughts that stress you out more than help you enjoy your life, look back, just like you were in the mall. Where did you "purchase" that thought? Thank the store for manufacturing that thought, but politely decline wearing it from now on.
After all, if you wore a pair of shoes that hurt your feet and made your feel look awful, would you still keep wearing them and complain or would you throw them out and put on the ones that make you feel and look good?
4/2/2011 01:01:46 pm
Does that mean you don't have to be on time?
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Why ask me?
- After many challenges and different crazy life experiences I am living my dream life and since my friends say I am pretty wisdomous and I think I am a little bit funny too, I want to share my life approach with you so you can live the life you love as well.
Here is a little bit about me:
- I am a creator of #1 Best Diet as selected by Harpers Baazar Magazine
- I started my career in the corporate world and didn't even know how to peel a shallot
- I have been a chef for celebrities for over 10 years
- I have a realistic approach to food and life
- I have a great relationship with food and can even let chocolate go bad because I simply forget I have it at home (something I wasn't able to do 10 years ago)
- I eat carbs whenever I feel like it without any guilt
- I used to hate to cook and now absolutely love being a private chef and a food relationship coach
- I wear whatever clothes I desire no matter what everyone is wearing or thinking
- I am in good shape and my body’s biological age is 13 years younger than the one in my passport
- I have experience being super poor, super wealthy and in between
- I’ve worked in corporate world and am now an entrepreneur
- I was married and divorced
- I used to cry going to work because I was so miserable with my boss
- I’ve had an emotional eating disorder
- I moved from Russia to USA alone at the age of 15
- I’ve lived in Russia, Europe and on both coasts of USA
- I have been super skinny and overweight
- I have been insecure and unhappy with reasons and secure and happy for no reason
- I used to wear glasses and healed my eyes with the power of thought and exercises
- I created "Couture Nutrition®" so you can have tailor-made solutions for your body and soul
- My brain usually comes up with jokes to soften stressful situations
- I think color coordination, sparkles and rainbows are underused